Dickbutt's adventure
by Fagtree
Summary: ... All in the title.


Like a boss Written by Jordan Heslop and Beth Schmutz

Once, in a land known as Forbiddia, lay a character that was ripped off from Final Fantasy X.  
He was so obviously copyrighted, this story was sued and was not allowed to be published.  
Although, you are currently reading this, so fudge you company that sued us, we came out on top, hahahahaha.  
Anyways, this character was named Dickbutt.  
And he had a ninety-two inch penis.  
He was a pimp.  
And had potato colored hair.  
And fought with a sword made of bread, he called it the Pastry Of Power .  
This sword was essentially useless in battle, although it was useful when he ran out of food.  
Dickbutt was able to do magic stuff, like shoot flames out his hand and shit, like they do on Avatar: The Last Air bender.  
One night, his water supply decreased greatly: luckily, he could store water in his huge ninety-two inch penis like a motherfucking camel.  
However, in order to get this water he stored, he had to suck his own dick, so it was only for emergencies.  
Bearing in mind his penis was bigger than him, this was a near impossible task.  
So he was constantly thirsty when he walked through any deserts.  
Vultures would constantly land on his dick.  
However, since he was magic, he could fly, so he didn t have to drag his penis everywhere, cause that would probably hurt like hell.  
This was quite a sight: this magical man known as Dickbutt flying around with his huge dick beneath him: he was almost like a reverse ant carrying a leaf to his home.  
However, since this land he lived in was very treacherous, he was the only one there, so he was forever alone.  
With this entire land to himself, he could freely masturbate by rubbing his huge prick against an oak tree.  
But this would cause a flood of semen, but again, since nobody lived there, not a single fuck was given.  
There was a cavernous area that had a buildup of this ultimate mega drown semen, and Dickbutt had heard some very peculiar noises coming from it.  
He decided to investigate.  
Operation Semen Caverns was but a failure, unfortunately.  
It turned out the cavernous area was really ovaries, and there were a bunch of deformed children drowning in the large flood of semen.  
At this point, he came to the realization Shit, these kids must be mine, since I am the only man in this land, and these are the only ovaries! So he gathered all of the deformed man children and took them to his house.  
His house was huge because of his penis, and he couldn t pay child support due to all of the money that was invested into his pretty lonely pube gel business.  
So he decided to go on a quest to violently murder the head of child support so he didn t have to pay for it.  
Then, Dickbutt realized that he was alone in the land of Forbiddia, so he didn t have to fucking pay it in the first place.  
However, since he has children now, he wasn t able to masturbate because he had to be a good role model or some bullshit.  
The oak tree was lonely without his huge veiny dick rubbing up against it.  
Soon, the oak tree grew jealous of all the man babies getting all of the attention from Dickbutt.  
He plotted to kill them (the corrosive semen had mutated him, gave him a gender and the capability of flight.)  
So he flew out of the ground, ready to murder all of Dickbutt s children.  
On the flight there, he thought of the song Tiptoe through the Tulips , and couldn t go through with it.  
It became apparent that this mutated tree was gay.  
His homosexuality overpowered him, so he went home, in search of another fagtree to have macho copulation with.  
However, he yearned for Dickbutt s massive penis.  
He missed it dearly.  
So every night, he went to Dickbutt s house, and molested him in the night, while he was asleep.  
Dickbutt would wake up with pinecones in his anus every morning for a year, but he did not question it, since he had to set an example for the children.  
One day, he woke up while the tree was molesting him.  
I knew it, why didn t you use a sapling, I could be pregnant! It turned out that Dickbutt was a hermaphrodite, and had a large dick and small ovaries.  
One of his children, Cockimplosion, walked in on this disgusting affair.  
Cockimplosion, like his dad, masturbated regularly, like all the other children.  
They had a swimming pool in the back garden full of their semen.  
Cockimplosion and all the other children joined in with the tree and Dickbutt to make one giant orgy.  
Now this orgy was one thing to behold: they all ended up with bark burn afterwards.  
Dickbutt was suddenly worried that his children would be taken away from him because he technically raped them.  
The children didn t seem to mind: they were the ones that joined in.  
And then Dickbutt realized: he didn t give a damn about the kids, they could die in a fire for all he cared.  
And with this beautiful story, I end on a question: could Dickbutt and Tree s distorted offspring have even more retarded potato babies, or were they basically infertile?  
But Treefag didn t technically have a penis, so they couldn t have Potato babies, as much as they tried (which was everyday).  
This was his life: rubbing his colossal Wang on the bark of the tree everyday (yes, that s a euphemism)  
And he was happy with his life, in this obviously copyrighted land of Forbiddia.  
He finally grew tired with Treefag and his children, and kicked em out of his house like a motherfucker.  
And then he ate them alive.  
With a fermented chicken period (also known as an egg to you).  
The End 


End file.
